Well hey there you! Welcome to the end of a HUGE 2015!
You know you don’t need an arbitrary date to start fresh, change your mind, your direction or your actions right?
Sometimes though, it is helpful to have a symbolic beginning to motivate you to do the work of reflection and projection required to envision what you’d like to invite into your life for a fabulous future.
And here we are at that time of year again…when focus turns to what possibilities a new year might bring. The start of a new year is both a traditional and an opportune time to reset our focus.
I’ve spun around the sun a few times now, and know about myself that having some goals I feel passionate about helps keep me motivated, focussed and discerning in my life choices.
What I have also learned is that making attainment of an ‘out there’ goal the perceived source of how I’d like to feel leads to dissatisfaction and disappointment, because this approach puts power OUTSIDE of yourself and somewhere other than the PRESENT.
Too many times I’ve thought that achieving, receiving or attaining ‘something’ would make me feel how I wanted…loved, successful, respected (for example)…only to arrive at my desired goal to find my life/health/relationships were a train wreck and the self satisfaction of box ticking was short lived.
So for the past few years, inspired by the talented Danielle La Porte and my amazing friend and mentor Krista Jane, I have used a process of identifying what I’d like to embody and experience in my life on a daily basis FIRST…and from there stepping up to the big picture stuff.
Getting under the WHY of what you want – deeply and intimately – to how you’d like to FEEL (as opposed to what you want to do, be or have), helps set you up for making choices that are aligned with your values, that you can apply in real time = right NOW.
There are goals and then there are goals with soul. The way you set yourself up to create your goals can revolutionise your life and experience of success.
I like to think of goal setting a little like yoga – if you can put your foot behind your head but are still an a-hole daily – you’ve kind of missed the point! Life is a choose-your-own-adventure that unfolds with many chapters and plot twists…and the journey is the everything, there will be many destinations along the way.
In the past I’ve run a face-to-face course on soul-goal setting called the Resolution Revolution, but this year I am not studio based so I thought I’d offer up my tips on identifying and setting soul based goals for y’all here as a little seasonal manifestation motivator!
Below you’ll find my 8 step guide to creating a high vibe life in 2016 and longer! If you’re ready to resolve to evolve in 2016, let’s play!
8 steps to creating a high vibe life from goals with soul!
Get prepped! – You’ll need writing implements and something to write on! If you’re keen to do this all in one session – set aside at least 2-3 hours of undisturbed you time. I usually run this is as a whole afternoon activity with yoga, healthy snacks and inspirational tunes!
Step 1 begins with a meditation on gratitude. Find a quiet space where you won’t be interrupted. Take 5-15 minutes to sit quietly, breathe gently and allow your heart to bring up all in your life that you’re grateful for. You can travel back as far through time as you like and make your way towards the present. Spend another few minutes writing down what – from this year in particular, including today – you’re grateful for. This will bring you up to the present moment with a positive mindset about all the good you’ve got in your life right now – a great energetic space to begin manifesting from!
This is a chance for you to look into your desires and values – What’s important and meaningful for you? What drives your decision-making? And then delve into WHY… and see if we can identify some feelings around them!
Divide a page into three columns. (Or if like me, you write too much, feel free to use three separate pages!)
On the left in Column 1, write down what you think you want to be/do/have (now or in a chosen period of time in the future).
In the middle Column 2, next to each item you’ve listed, spend some time unpacking WHY you want attain, obtain or achieve this particular goal. Hint: look to find a feeling word, and an emotional connection to your answer…it might take 5 or 10 why’s to REALLY get to the bottom of your answer. Keep asking and be honest with yourself.
E.g.: I want to lose 5kg…WHY? Because I want to fit back into my old clothes…WHY? Because I looked hot when I wore my skinny jeans…WHY? Because I FELT confident = BINGO!! The external goal might be about 5 kilos on the surface, but the internal one is really about regaining a sense of SELF CONFIDENCE… Can you see where I’m going with this?!
Rather than trying to drop a dress size by going on an unsustainable crash diet, there are plenty of ways to start incorporating feeling more confident into your daily life. A commitment to healthy movement that you enjoy and that works with your lifestyle and finances is one of them…the by-products of increased physical activity include not only weight loss (if paired with appropriate eating), but improved mood and physical health… All winners for improving how you feel about yourself and importantly, much more sustainable in the long run too!
Your turn! Don’t be shy – be honest and own your truth… If it’s because you want someone else to think/feel something about you (I’m totally guilty of this), delve a little deeper into how you could cultivate that feeling for yourself or get to the bottom of the why behind your need for external validation…it’s a process!
In the 3rd and final column, take some time to identify and write down what activities, pastimes or behaviours or give you the most pleasure, enjoyment and sense of pure joy! You can go back as far in your life as you want for these…sometimes it’s useful to tap into our childhood sense of simple pleasures and wonder! Again, use this as an opportunity to delve a little deeper into how these made you feel.
Why do we do this last column? Because fun, joy, lightness and positivity are all great motivators. If your goals feel heavy and like ‘hard work’ they will be, and you may not be so inclined to stay the course if this is the case. However, if your goals feel like a natural expression of your joy, passion, heartfelt service or creative mission the energy you draw on to fulfil them will come from not just from you, but from your essential source too and therefore be limitless. Sounds a bit woo-woo, I know, but trust me!
Imagine and then write down your absolute, supremo, PERFECT day! You can envision it as today, tomorrow or it can be 1+, 5+ or more years from now… As you write what your day entails, be detailed and descriptive – include everything from who you spend time with to what you do and especially remember to pay particular attention to how you FEEL as you move through…these elements are key!
If you can’t conjure up your Perfect Day just yet, it sometimes helps to imagine the current ‘you’ meeting your ideal future self and having a conversation about how awesome your life is in the future. Again, let the conversation be intricately detailed and emotionally charged. Your feelings will guide you to your highest and best expression.
Have fun and be limitless! Play with what’s possible!
Find a highlighter or another coloured pen. Grab your three column list and your ‘Perfect Day’ story.
Cross check your list of WHY‘s from Column 2 with any feelings you listed in your Perfect Day…these are hot ticket items for creating the basis of your everyday.
Write them all down on a separate sheet of paper as a master list of the feelings and values that most resonate with you and that you’d most like to embody everyday. Also check Column 3 against your Perfect Day – if there are any feelings here that are not listed in your perfect day and they resonate with you, transfer them to your master list of feelings & values.
Compare columns 1 & 3 – are there any activities on your list of things that bring you joy that are also on you list of goals or within your goals? If so great! If not, are there any ways you can bring some of them back into your life?
Finally, looking at your master sheet of feelings now, can you identify up to THREE of these that stand out the most? Highlight or rewrite these on another sheet of paper.
Look again at your Perfect Day, your list of goals/behaviours and your list of feelings. Is there a way you can now re-frame and rewrite your goals with new language that incorporates the top three feelings you want to embody? Use active language in the present tense – you never know how soon this could be you!
Also identify whether your new soul goals are weighted in any one particular area of your life… It’s easy to load up on career goals and forget about interpersonal relationships or your health and wellbeing for example… And if there are elements missing, create new ones to fill the gaps!
You might like to create groups based on your interests and life or bundle a few things into broader categories. Personally, I like bundling together:
- Business/service – because for me these two are interlinked, societal & charitable contributions might live somewhere else for you
- Creative/learning – because my personal development is a creative process for me
- Relationships – incorporating personal, interpersonal and universal which captures interactions on both the worldly and spiritual planes for me, and
- Wellness/lifestyle – because how I live impacts my health and vice versa.
Once you’ve got a holistic set of soul goals you can even turn them into daily mantras or manifestos: e.g.’I am confident, serene and aligned‘… ‘My actions come from confident, calm decisions made in line with my authentic values‘…
Also if there’s anything left on your goals that’s actually a ‘should’ – it needs to GO – or be reframed just like the all other ones – so that it resonates with your positive vibe, and feels like something you actually WANT to do: e.g. Turn that obligatory sounding ‘start saving for a house‘ into ‘I am super stoked that I invest 10% of my monthly income in my dream home on the waterfront in Byron Bay‘…!
Define what success looks like TO YOU… and break ’em down into achievable daily actions!
No one else gets to say when you’ve achieved your goal. Your soul, heart and mind will tell you what success looks and – no surprises here – FEELS like to you!
Long-term dream realisation requires mini motivators along the way. Breaking down your goals into smaller, achievable chunks helps keeps them manageable and motivational.
Once you’ve spent some time chunking down the big ticket items into yearly, monthly, and daily actions that help you embody your desired feelings, outline exactly what success might feel/look like for you at each stage.
Heading back to our losing 5kg vs. self confidence example; since redefining your goal, you may not necessarily feel that fitting into your skinny jeans is the signature of success anymore… You might now set your goalpost as… ‘I will know I’ve regained my self confidence when I can look in the mirror and say something kind to myself, instead of something critical‘… and once you’ve achieved that, the goalpost might shift…to everyday for a week, a month, a year… Whether or not your jeans fit may become irrelevant to the relationship you’ve rebuilt with yourself. Which is a deeper, more lasting success (in my opinion!).
Now you get to be creative and bring your vision to life!
If you’re visual/crafty you can collect some images from magazines and make yourself a good old-fashioned vision board poster. I LOVE these because I’m super tactile and enjoy the cut and paste collage action like a five year old! I still have a collection of old vision boards and occasionally revisit them and bring forward some images that have remained meaningful to me.
If you’re more technology or electronic media inclined Pinterest is a great place to create yourself a range of electronic vision boards. Or you could use a program like Google Slideshow to prepare your own vision slideshow or video!
Here’s where you put your money where your mouth is… It’s time to take action! Nothing happens with out you communing with the universe and exercising your power of CHOICE. Free will is a wonderful thing, and you’re in the driver’s seat! The only place you can apply the power of choice is NOW and the only true freedom we have is to choose our thoughts…so the work begins within first – and them moves out.
You also have powers of focus to help you on your way, and like a muscle, focus can be exercised and cultivated through practices such as meditation.
I hope you’ve had fun getting to the bottom of WHY you want what you want and HOW you’d like to FEEL in the coming little while!
I’ve followed this exact process to create a kick ass life and lifestyle change for myself over the last 5 years and totally think it’s worth a try! I’d love to hear your feedback on how it goes for you!
So go forth and live your dreams my manifesting mavens! Dream big – but remember – the universe has a WAY bigger and better imagination than you! You’ve set some goals for the future based on how you’d like to experience your daily life – but don’t let yourself be limited by them. Always leave a little room for magic to happen! Spontaneity is the spice of life!
Wishing you a marvellous year ahead of feeling exactly how you want to in each moment, and living the life you’ve always dreamed about!